[caption id="attachment_1887" align="alignleft" width="236"] "A Rainy Day" Oil on Canvas 16x20[/caption]
I am so glad you stopped by! This morning I took my baby to get her wisdom teeth taken out. we were sitting in the back waiting to see the doctor, and I was struck by how quiet the office was. I felt like my baby was a little nervous so I made mindless conversation and tried to help make her smile and feel at ease. Unable to stand it, in mid sentence I just looked at her and said "It's so quiet I feel like I'm in the library." She agreed, and we laughed about it and continued conversation. I really don't know why the quiet bothered me so much. Typically the quiet is one of my favorite places, but not today. Today the quiet made me feel a little nervous. I could feel fear tip toeing around the corner and anxiousness right on my doorstep. The quiet made me feel small and helpless, but my baby needed me to be confident and strong. I put on a good face and did my best not to reveal my true feelings.
The Doctor arrived and sweetly gave me directions to the waiting room. When I stood to leave, I felt my heart rate begin to pick up. I thought I might lose my breath. I swallowed hard and pushed my emotions from my throat to the pit of my stomach. I found a playful smile and cheerfully told my baby I loved her. I kissed her cheek and walked out into the hall. The only sound I heard was the door closing behind me. I stood in the stillness of the quiet for 3 or 4 seconds then made my way to the waiting room. Would you believe the waiting room was completely empty? The quiet was so quiet it was loud.
Once I sat down, my heart and my mind had a very active conversation about the intimidation of the quiet. My heart seemed to be winning the argument because it was steadily picking up in pace. Then, in the quiet, God sweetly reminded me that He loves my baby even more than I do. My heart rate started to slow down. He reminded me that at HIs command the sun rises and sets. He is God. He is mighty. A few wisdom teeth? He's got that! My emotions? He's got that too!He is my refuge and my strength. My weakness does not surprise Him. My weakness allows Him to be strong. Today, in the quiet, He held me. My fear became rest. Then, in the quiet, the door opened and my baby was fine and ready to go home. I am thankful for the quiet. I love that God was waiting on me there. I am so thankful that He is patient when my fear and my weakness cloud my heart and my mind. I love that with one breath He removes the clouds and reveals His power and sweet peace. He met me in the quiet today. Love love love Ruthie
Isaiah 26:3 You will keep him in perfect peace; Whose mind is stayed on Thee, because he trusts in You.